Our chunky monkey after taking a bath...

Me and my silly boys

I love this picture. His big brother always makes him smile!

Such a cool dude!

MY FUNERAL

Did the title catch your attention? I hope so. Today I was thinking about how short life is. I understand that it's really hard to make time for others because life in this day in age just moves at such a fast pace. You here one day and gone the next. Then at your funeral, many people come to say their goodbyes; people who you haven't talked to in years. Why is it that they feel so compelled to go pay their "last" respects, when they weren't there for you when you were alive? When I die, if you are someone who hasn't made an effort to talk to me, or come see me, then just save yourself some extra time in your busy schedule, and don't come to my funeral! I'd rather spend time with you while I can enjoy your visit too!!!

So, last night I stayed awake, crying quite a bit. It started because I am extremelly hurt over one of my brothers who hasn't spoken to me since before Christmas. Then I realized that I haven't seen my nieces and nephews since November. I miss them more than anyone realizes.

Have I not spent my whole life giving to anyone with a need? Have I not been there for my family when they needed me the most? Haven't I tried so hard to stay in contact with my family and friends? Am I not sincere, loving, and honest, like I think I am?

Tell me then, WHY in the world does it seem like most of my family and the people that I thought were my friends, are not here for me now? No phone calls, no e-mails...nothing! Once I stopped e-mailing, or calling...things just ended. Just in case you were one of those friends or family members who happen to stumble upon this blog, I just want to thank you. Thanks for making me question my relationships with everyone else. Do they REALLY care about me and my family? Or is their life just too busy or so important that they will forget about me too? I don't care what excuse anyone has; I'm hurt, deeply!